Brain Bubbles

(excerpts from  “Hidden in Plain Sight”, by Mark Buchanan  and Martin Luther:)

“…life itself implicates us in sin and compromise: just getting out of bed this morning was act of thrusting a fallen man into a sin-wracked world, and some no-good thing was bound to come from it.  My embrace of one task requires my neglect of another…..There is no waking up without some fall out.  Every good deed sets in motion a chain of reactions, some of which will, by hook or crook, make havoc.

  Sin boldly, Luther said in response.    Don’t let life’s inherent complexity, its pact with the devil, keep  you from doing anything.  If every act,  for the best of ends, is sinful anyhow, then sin boldly.  Don’t anguish over every last little thing.  Do what needs doing, and leave the outcome to God.

Luther said:   “  If you are a preacher of mercy, do not preach an imaginary but true mercy.  If the mercy is true, you must therefore bear the true, not an imaginary sin.God does not save those who are only imaginary sinners. Be a sinner, and let your sin be strong (sin boldly), but let your trust in Christ be stronger, and rejoice in Christ who is the victor over sin, death, and the world.  We will commit sins while we are here, for this life is not  a place where justice resides. ”

Why am I reading this?  I am reading this and the Petrine epistles because I am looking for answers of how to receive - I mean fully receive and embrace grace, to appreciate it.  As my homie Peter says in 1 Peter 1:8  Though you do not see Him now, you trust; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy.”  

 That’s where I want to be - rejoicing over him with inexpressible joy.   This has been very absent in me for a while.  Probably for a couple of years.  Why? Lots of reasons.   But none of which are bigger than God’s love and his ability to overcome them.  Recently I discovered the true underlying reason I was not rejoicing in Him - lack of faith.  Argh!   and I thought that could never be a problem.   Responsibilities/ stewardships,  have just been piling up in my life - one after another.  I have been mad at God for putting me in between a rock and a hard place. 

                                            I’m damned if I do the stuff that needs “doing” - because it will be at the expense of spending time with someone else -

                                           and I’m damned if I don’t - because if I neglect the stuff that needs doing’ it will negatively affect someone or something else.     Does anyone know what I am talking about here?????

       I’ve just been trying to bury my proverbial head in the sand and it feels like death.  Feeling like my attention to one task or person causes the neglect of another task or person and just really feeling the guilt over that pile up.   But as Peter points out that faith is so precious  - a treasure, costly and rare, it is the conviction that  the pursuit of God is the good life! So there it is.  I may feel like I am drowning in this and that, but the truth is, is that faith is my anchor, the pursuit of God is my anchor, my “good life”.   I must truly trust in the Lord and do the next thing and not worry about the fall out.  Life calls for more faith, not more time or more skill or more resources.    SIN BOLDLY  - embrace grace fervently!  

Thought I would post some excerpts from an article in Brio Magazine - definately worth a read. 

“Tim and I (authors of the article) have worked with and talked to thousands of teens and have learned that being friends with guys/ girls is important, but we know an even deeper and more powerful way to relate to them that will so way more than simply keep your hormones in check.  IT will teach you how to build the kind of relationship that we all long for.  If you think becoming friends is radical, listen to what God says about how to treat the opposite sex:  

(1 Timothy 5:1-2)  “Do not rebuke an older man harshly, but exhort him as if he were you father.  Treat younger men as brothers, older women as mothers, and younger women as sisters, with absolute purity.”

Aren’t there some boundaries that almost automatically emerge if we treat each other as a sibling?  I mean, think of how you treat your brother/ sister.      Do you ever hug him? Of course.      Are there certain places or ways that you would never touch your brother/ sister?  YES !!     Now that we have planted that image firmly in your mind and totally grossed you out, let’s move on.

      If you are a follower of J.C. , you’re part of God’s family……..so, like it or not, that guy / girl you are crushing on is you brother/ sister, spiritually speaking.  Recognizing that reality can raise some serious walls in your relationship.   What if we said we’re going to be friends first and then while being friends, said we’re going to act as if we’re related and treat one another like brothers and sisters? What would that look like? 

….back off on the physical part…….think twice about why you’re doing what you’re doing - get honest about why you’re doing it

….respecting the other person as a bro or sis means recognizing that this person is not an object or a play toy - but a human being, someone God considers valuable - so valuable that He sent His Son to give His life for that person.   That bro or sis that you have your eye on isn’t there simply for your amusement, ego boost or personal fulfillment.  He/She is a person with a background, a family…someone with dreams and goals, someone who is a walking story.     Instead of camping out on looks, you would find out about the person.  Treating them as a sibling forces you to see more of that story.  You put effort into understanding where someone is spiritually, socially, mentally.  God wants you to treat that person wit the same respect that He wants you to be treated with.

….Just as you would want someone dating your bro or sis to respect him or her, you also would want to that person to appreciate your sibling for who he or she is. You would want your sibling to be treated in a way that allowed them the ability to express themselves in the unique way God made them.  Nothing controlling, manipulative or possessive at all. 

…it means accepting differences, respecting their strengths, and weaknesses…encouraging one another to use the gifts and abilities God has entrusted to each of us.  We are not clones of one another.

….you would want to protect your sibling….keep them out of harm.  You would not want to see someone who played games with your bro or sis -  flirting with them, then dumping them after a few weeks.   If he or she were your sibling, how would you want someone to treat them?

    If you are in a relationship, you can protect the other person by getting a handle on your own emotions.  If you go insanely jealous any time you see him or her talking to another person, you can control that.  Not by trying to control them, but by keeping your own heart in check.  That kind of jealousy is grounded in fear, and fear does ugly things to people.  You can protect someone, by NOT trying to control them.

…if you tend to manipulate the other person, where it’s all about you - what you need, what you want to do, what you want to talk about - you can control that too.   You were taught by your parents to always share and take turns with your bro and sis - that means putting your needs on the back burner sometimes.

….when it comes to protecting the other’s purity (and yours) …know when he is vulnerable, when you are vulnerable, - just stay away from eachother.

Recognizing and honoring the family bonds that we have in Christ can raise some significant walls in relationships.  Seeing eachother in the context of their bigger story - his/her individuality, family, skills - helps us see the object of our affection less as an object and more as another human being.”

excerpts from “Brotherly Love”, Brio Magazine,  by Chip Ingram and Tim Walker 

   I must be blind but I am not finding my blog listed in the blog list - “Brain Bubbles”.

 …..Anyway, I was having a sanguine brainstorm this morning as I was getting ready for the day.  I think a lack of sleep does that to me.  I start thinking up all these ideas, very few of which ever come to fruition.  Then I remembered that I had a blog on which I could write these all down and later edit if I feel like it.  I haven’t written on the ole blog in quite a while.  Maybe that’s why I am not listed anymore :>(    Well anyway, I was remembering a particularly fun cell group night with Paula, Sherri and Heidi .  We were recounting our lives to one another and it occurred to me how different we all are, and how we each have stories to tell.  What a great book that would make!      Then the perfect title popped into my head:  The Sisterhood of the Elastic Waistband Pants.  Unless you are a chick, and/or middle-aged, you probably won’t get it.   Unfortunately, I am no writer.  But seriously, just what I have experienced alone, multiply it times 4 (like the characters in the original “Sisterhood” series) and there could be a decent book in the making.  I guess what got me to thinking about this is the surprising amount of deaths that I have been surrounded by.  Maybe it’s always been this way, but I never noticed it before until someone close to me died - and then it hit home.  Opened my eyes to a suffering that was new to me.  Actually it’s not just death of the body , but death of the soul in the form of depression.  Alot of depressed people around me.  It’s amazing how, when we are younger, we function through, we have sharpness of mind, energy, hope. But as we get older, it all slows down -very gradually.  It all becomes much less manageable and you realize what dependence on the Lord really means.  I can’t even imagine trying to “manage” with out the Lord.  I am sure that my mother-in-law, with her arthritis, and weak heart, would have a lot more to say about that than I.  Everyone of us in cell that night shared about the themes that were running through their lives.  Mine had to do with death and depression.  Others’ had to do with kids, or marriage, or jobs.  And we are all learning to deal with these issues differently as we grow into our older years.   I know that I am not “old”.  But I also know that I am not “young” either.  I’m in between there somewhere, constantly assessing what I can and can’t handle, what I can and can’t eat, wear, drink, say, lift,  remember, or buy anymore.   I guess you could call that “wisdom”.  Yeh , I like that, “wisdom”.  I am in my “wisdom-age”.  Sounds much more flattering than middle-age.  Not that it matters, as I go to change into my elastic-waistband pants.  Argh!

In the spirit of J Small Z, I thought I would do some confessing and sharing of my own.

When it comes to loving difficult people, I have recently discovered that I am in sin there.  I’m sure you are thinking, “No shit, Sherlock!”.   Well let me elaborate.  You see, my approach to loving difficult people, has been to feel sorry for their inability to see how difficult they are, extend them grace, and stay out of their way.  Difficult people scare me.  My mother was difficult and a sister I grew up with was difficult.  I think it was the display of infantile anger that scared me.   Maybe from time to time, when convenient, I would say something “nice”, or do something for them, that I think would be construed as caring.  Another good strategy was to play dumb, “What?  I had no idea that my comment or action was offensive to you”.  Yeh right, nice passive-aggressive action.  Like pouring hot coals on their heads - these worked like a charm.  So the pattern still continues.   As Katy Downs spoke last Weds.  I realized I am stuck in my ability to love.  I literally do not know what to do when I am confronted with  a nasty comment,  a scowl, or even at times - presense - of someone I have at that moment deemed as “difficult”.   It’s like hitting a wall.                         Brain bubbles start flying:

          “Should I ask what’s wrong - no they’ll just growl at me and say ”Nothing!”. “”.     ”Should I tell them their comment was uncalled for or uncaring?” No, they’ll just get defensive and put it back on me that  I have the problem.  

      OMG!  Yes, it’s probably me.  I am the one with the problem.  I need to just shut up, go home , and pray about it.  What is wrong with me…” 

 What’s wrong with me is that I am stuck at that point, I have hit the Wall and I don’t know how to deal.  My mind literally goes blank.   If it were one of my kids who did that, I would automatically call them on it.  “OK, that was rude, knock it off!”.  Or, “I can see that you are angry, and don’t try to deny it, what is up with you?”.   Do I say this to an adult?  Who the hell knows what you can say to an adult, especially when they are not acting like an adult.  I am obviously scared to go there.   - I’m scared of saying something, then they say what I think they are going to say, then my mind goes blank- totally blank, and I end up apologizing, and out of embarrassment I never speak with that person again.  That’s the fear. 

 KATIE DOWNS - YOU ARE THE SHRINK OF ALL SHRINKS - HEEEEEEEELP!

can’t wait for next weeks class.

This is my first post.  I’m not sure why I decided to start a blog.  I guess I’ll just roll with it. ……  I saw a really inspiring story on ESPN about a  college guy who tragically died and his parents told their story behind it.  If you are interested, check out the link below.  This kid literally gave of himself to others.  I read some other related links about him and found that he was a christian . http://sports.espn.go.com/broadband/video/videopage?videoId=3069036This story helped me to deal with my nephew’s death.  Trying to make sense of a young person dying is difficult and tiring.  I guess this story gave me some closure.